When the past changes in the current daylight

Question of a client: How do I think my way out?

A young man enters my room. He has never had an appointment with a psychologist. He feels humilated that he has to come. I have to do it myself, he says. What? I ask him. To deal with this, he says. I am thinking and thinking. I have to think harder to decide what I have to do with this situation.

Tell me? I ask him.

He tells me that somebody came to his door and told him that his mother has had a love affair when he was a child and was still living at home. He shakes his head as if he tries to shake it off. He cannot believe this.

Suddenly he can clarify that he has always felt that something was going on. That he thought that he was it himself being so suspiciously. He searched for something and never knew for what he was looking for.

What do I have to do and think about this? he asks me. What do you feel? I ask.

His face turns red. I don’t know, he says with a strange sound in his voice.

You do feel something, I can see.

The emotion appears. How could she, he angrily says, how could she do this and leave us? What kind of mother did I have? Was she the woman that I have known as my mother? Who was she?

To be continued next week.