Mothers, let your children go!

When the time has come for me to leave?

A twenty-one year old woman comes for coaching. Her mother brings her. She is worried about the young woman. When I start talking tot the young lady, the mother talks all the time. We send her away, so I can talk to the daughter.

She tells me that she wants to leave the house. She wants to live in the city and leading the life of a college student. What keeps you home? I ask.

My mother, she answers. My little brother has died and I am the only child left in the house. I cannot go. My mother would not be able to handle this and would be so sad.

When you leave the house, you won’t be dead, I say to her. She nodds. She understands, but her mother won’t. A very loyal child.

Do you want to live with your mother forever? No no, she answers very firmly. When will the time be there to leave? She shakes her head. I don’t know. What will make the difference if you leave now or a year later? I ask.

The insight is coming. She cannot avoid leaving, it will happen eventually or very soon. The time is over.

When we walk into the hallway, the mother walks towards us. She gets her daughters coat and dresses her like a four year old child. She places the cap on her head.

What is happening here? I ask. She is twenty-one year old, she can decide herself if she wants to wear her coat and cap. You dress her like a child.

The mother does not understand me and the daughter looks down. Time to go has not come yet.